Saturday, May 31, 2008

“True Liberty is found in Transparency” and “Sanctification is a Process”

I haven’t written in a while. I haven’t known what to write mostly because I've found myself in a place where I have to take the next step into honestly looking at myself and my role in this life. A place where I must honestly confess my sins becoming transparent which in turn is revealing that I lack trust in God because I am afraid to be transparent. That’s hard to swallow.

I keep asking God for help, expecting he will deliver me with a snap of his giant fingers. But giving little to no action on my part due to a fear of being let down. I say I know God loves me, but what keeps me from fully trusting, letting go, giving myself to him shortcomings and all openly so he can use them for my good and his glory? It’s a spiritual battle where my mind is attacked. Eph 6:12 says it clearly - For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

I’ve been reading two books, both of which are pointing me to saturating myself in scripture. That is the way to renewal, renewal of the mind, body and spirit. I want so badly to be a bright light reflecting God’s glory.

Oh, the joys of those who trust the Lord, who have no confidence in the proud or in those who worship idols. O Lord my God, you have performed many wonders for us. Your plans for us are too numerous to list. You have no equal. If I tried to recite all your wonderful deeds, I would never come to the end of them.
Psalm 40:4-5

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6

1 comment:

Lisa said...

I'm so glad we talked yesterday! God is inviting us to a new place and asking us to trust Him. I am praying for you, that you can be like Indiana Jones and step out in faith even though it looks like you will fall. Is the fall we are afraid of, or the lie that has somehow burned in our brains/hearts that He won't catch us? Something I need to think about too. Thanks for helping me talk through a few things myself, and thank you for entrusting me with your journey of becoming transparent and fearless.<: